Tuesday Feb 07, 2023
I Had Enough: Cutting off a Family Member. For Good.
Today we’re joined by guest Jen Ruddy. Jen shares a little bit about who she is and where she’s at in her life now, before jumping into discussing her defining moment: the moment when she decided to no longer speak to her mother at the age of 34.
This decision was made after a weekend visit with her mom. They were all on the way to a national park with her mom trailing behind, who ended up getting lost on the way. She was in hysterics when she arrived, convinced that losing her along the way was purposeful. This was when Jen knew she couldn’t take it anymore.
Jen’s mom does have her own share of trauma and Jen believes she likely chose to have kids to uplift her and encourage her self-esteem. The role of her kids in her life was always to agree with her. If she didn’t get the exact compliment she wanted, all of her kids would get in trouble. Additionally, she always wanted perfectly beautiful, skinny kids. This behavior was difficult to endure.
Another person Jen had to cut off completely was her first husband. When he tripped her during an outing on purpose, she decided she was done. We often feel like we need to suffer when this isn’t really the case. You have to find the courage you need to move on.
Over the years, Jen has decided to focus more on enjoying her life and healing her trauma. Making tough decisions has been helpful not just for Jen, but for her family as well. It’s okay to do what is necessary for you to feel safe.
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